Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Post yours, forum games, and other post++ styled threads go here.
User avatar
Alice
⦂☽
Posts: 3879
Joined: December 23rd, 2014, 10:47 pm
Location: Wonderland
Contact:

Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Alice » December 26th, 2014, 11:05 pm

Any sort of tabletop or text-based roleplaying game should fit here. (D&D, Warhammer, roleplays such as The ballad of Edgardo below, etc.) You should probably put the images in [ sp] tags so the thread is easier to navigate, especially if it's a long story such as the aforementioned Ballad of Edgardo.

Four monks taking themselves out in one round:
Image

Insane monk punching themselves to death:
Image

The ballad of Edgardo:
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image


Archer air strike:
Image

Hilarious elf cock-blocking:
Image

Kribnefka the Dragon Bluffer:
Image

Barbarians and their weapons:
Image

Let's ignore the end of the world in favor of being politically topical:
Image

That Guy DM:
Image
💙💙💙
Image
Image

User avatar
potato_sniff
Cousin Janet
Posts: 73
Joined: December 24th, 2014, 2:04 am
Location: In some box somewhere

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby potato_sniff » December 27th, 2014, 12:20 am

all you need to know is: Half-giant with a jump ring *able to jump 30ft up* Flying into the air, and then stomping on a halfling

User avatar
Lead Luigi
Goldilocks Mario
Posts: 353
Joined: December 25th, 2014, 7:51 pm
Location: IDK I think it was like a pocket dimension or somethin
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Lead Luigi » December 27th, 2014, 1:51 am

These are amazing, especially "The ballad of Edgardo"
something's coming...


Fuck Purple Town

User avatar
Alice
⦂☽
Posts: 3879
Joined: December 23rd, 2014, 10:47 pm
Location: Wonderland
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Alice » December 27th, 2014, 1:56 am

Edgardo being reposted on another site I frequent is actually the reason I decided to make the thread, lol. Some of these stories they get on 4chin are absolutely brilliant.
💙💙💙
Image
Image


User avatar
Lead Luigi
Goldilocks Mario
Posts: 353
Joined: December 25th, 2014, 7:51 pm
Location: IDK I think it was like a pocket dimension or somethin
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Lead Luigi » December 27th, 2014, 2:07 am

Alice wrote:Edgardo being reposted on another site I frequent is actually the reason I decided to make the thread, lol. Some of these stories they get on 4chin are absolutely brilliant.


If there is one thing 4chun does well, it has to be some of the greentext stories. Seriously, some of them make me laugh so much.
something's coming...


Fuck Purple Town

User avatar
Xilo The Odd
Posts: 13
Joined: December 24th, 2014, 1:40 am

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Xilo The Odd » December 27th, 2014, 2:26 am

i got a good one, Alice might remember this one from my campaign.

so my group managed to acquire an artifact that was pretty dangerous from some ruins far off, when they get back to town there was a commotion and a large crowd of worried people, while they went to investigate a Thief knicked the artifact off the one holding it. they noticed this and give chase.

the thief runs down into a tunnel to the cities advanced aquaduct and sewer system. they pass through the sewer system first, the mage gets the bright idea to try and stop him from progressing further by igniting the raw sewage exposed to the air. hes late and the thief has already made it into the cleaning facility. and the only way for the party to progress at this point, is for everyone to make a successful jump check to clear a line of burning sewage.

the fighter and the rogue clear it easily, the sorcerer that started this mess just barely makes it, Ranger barely even needed the roll, basically to not confirm crit fail.

last was the heavily armored, cleric.
he rolls... 2.
give him a second chance with a reflex save to stop his fall.
Failed
falls into the mess and takes damage.
give him a fortitude save.
Nat 1.
not only is he now sickened and burned, he will never get that smell off him for a very long time without some kind of divine blessing.
Bwee bwee bwee bwee!
Image

User avatar
Alice
⦂☽
Posts: 3879
Joined: December 23rd, 2014, 10:47 pm
Location: Wonderland
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Alice » December 27th, 2014, 2:33 am

Xilo The Odd wrote:Ranger barely even needed the roll, basically to not confirm crit fail.

It's been awhile so I don't remember for sure but I'm like 99% certain that was me so of course the ranger could clear it, lol. And yeah, I do remember the sorcerer falling in. That was hilarious. I think that was before Alex and Jason started inviting Erik and bogging everything down so playing or DMing wasn't fun.

Edit: Also there was the more recent one where my ranger had a wolf that kept tripping that young dragon to the point where it couldn't even put up any fight.
💙💙💙
Image
Image


FiftyKappas
Posts: 22
Joined: December 29th, 2014, 12:18 am
Location: Sitting on a block somewhere

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby FiftyKappas » December 29th, 2014, 5:41 am

Well, I've only had the one round of D&D to my name, but it was enough of a thing that I could go into it (warning, it's a doozy), but where to start...Alrighty, let's start off with the characters:

>the DM's character, a human monk, kind of a typical monk dude
>another human monk by the name of JACOB SPACE who somehow solved a couple's marriage problem with punching
>a dragonkin paladin of Bahamut
>a cat-man ranger who had previously been attacked by a bear before peeps were in the bar
>a constantly-drunk dwarf bard whose instrument of choice was a flute in the handle of a warhammer
>my character, some fox-girl sorceress whose character hadn't quite been established because I was terrible about that
>a human rogue who I think was the only evil person in the group

And with that out of the way...

Things started off in a bar where the dwarf (Rban was his name) was playing badly, the rogue was trying to pick pockets, and JACOB SPACE attempted to slam half a dozen bottles of vodka after solving marriage issues (I think he made it through four before passing out) and then nothing else really happened. So then the couple came in and were in a tizzy over some horse thieves, and after they pleaded for help, Jacob promptly ran out of the bar and straight into the lake from sheer enthusiasm of dispensing JUSTICE upon the thieves. After fishing him out, the party went to go do typical investigation things (with Rban failing miserably on all counts) and afterwards tracked the thieves to their hideout. Cue Jacob walking up to the door and admiring its architecture before getting smacked in the face with the front door for three points of damage while everyone else kind of hides (and Rban passed out in a nearby bush). After some small talk, the only battle begins. Cat-man starts shooting at dudes, everyone else except me and the dwarf leap into battle, and the paladin's streak of being literally unable to hit anything (and the rogue's streak of basically hiding all the time) begin. Meanwhile, my character gets surrounded by like four rogues, and the first one to attack fails miserably and trips. My followup attack also fails miserably, causing me and the other three guys to trip all over ourselves. It's looking terrible for me, except Rban spent the previous round recovering from his hangover and decided to stumble over and deck one of the enemies with his hammer, and the non-crazy monk came over and whacked one of the other guys...and then after all the enemies died (one due to basically getting executed, and another because the dwarf passed out on him), a city guardsman shows up, and then afterwards a couple of half orcs and a trained dire bear show up.

So the second part. The paladin is still unable to hit anything, the guardsman practically takes out the half-orcs by himself because literally all his rolls were crits, manages to get in one or two hits on the bear before it tears him in half. Meanwhile, all the melee peeps were doing their best not to get murdalized by the bear, of which most of them kind of did, while I sat at the back with the bard as a meatshield and launched Heat Rays at it, doing like 50-some of the 80-some damage required to kill the stupid thing (also the paladin finally landed a hit with her falchion, got a crit, did like four points of damage), and the best part(?). Our rogue tried to get a sneak attack on the bear by throwing a dagger at it and completely whiffed, and afterwards...the bear kind of did lewd things to him because the DM was tired of him constantly hiding. Next round, we finally kill the thing and get everybody back on their feet, more or less. Then a cleric and another guardman showed up, and then nothing else happened, and then nothing happened afterwards because trying to schedule sessions around like eight different work schedules just didn't work out.


I don't remember a lot of the character names, it was too long ago, and it was kind of a shame it didn't get anywhere because I would kinda like to do more D&D stuff and stuff and things. As an added note, Jacob's player wanted to eventually have somebody summon a megaraptor that he could ride on while the bard was playing some sweet guitar track so that he could do an epic leaping punch off of it.

...So yeah. Walls of text. Sorry, I don't know how to do the thing where you make it to where you click on the thing and the text shows up. I'll edit in the tags once I know how to do the thing, to save everyone's eyes.
Psy...duck?

User avatar
Isocitration
Citric Acid Spectre
Posts: 454
Joined: December 24th, 2014, 12:33 am

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Isocitration » February 10th, 2015, 12:05 pm

Man I need to learn to d&d someday

(buhmp)
<Isocitration> metaphors are hard to swallow
<tovakj> that's why we have analogies

User avatar
Lead Luigi
Goldilocks Mario
Posts: 353
Joined: December 25th, 2014, 7:51 pm
Location: IDK I think it was like a pocket dimension or somethin
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Lead Luigi » February 10th, 2015, 1:37 pm

We need to play D&D with this forum's members one day
something's coming...


Fuck Purple Town

Sarusig
Posts: 345
Joined: December 25th, 2014, 4:54 pm
Location: Elsewhere

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Sarusig » February 10th, 2015, 2:34 pm

Earth plays, Alice plays, Taters plays, Rhihad plays, the Kappa played once...

Man we got some serious nerds here.
Project Pokémon team - Music, QA, Writing, Master of taking notes in .txt forms sometimes

#shootitinthemouth

User avatar
Tovarisch Red Yoshi
Resident Commie Chameleon
Posts: 1949
Joined: December 29th, 2014, 10:57 pm
Location: Ashtree

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Tovarisch Red Yoshi » February 10th, 2015, 3:14 pm

I was invited to play by my highschool friends but everytime we'd make an arrangement to do something it fell through
wikipedia wrote:The word "w00t" itself was first seen in 1994.[citation needed] The expression rose in popularity in the late 1990s and early 2000s (decade) mostly on MMORPG such as RuneScape. It remains a niche Internet term and is not in general usage. The symbolic approximation of Latin letter forms makes w00t a prime example of internet leetspeak. It may also sometimes be seen spelled as "wewt" or "wought".
Isocitration wrote:<Isocitration> a long obscure nonsequitur that must be explained
<Isocitration> the joke is funny because of that alone
<tovakj> you've known me how long, yet?
<tovakj> yes
<tovakj> you're finally figuring out my aesthetic

User avatar
InsaneIntentions1
Posts: 708
Joined: February 6th, 2015, 9:18 pm
Location: The catacombs
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby InsaneIntentions1 » February 10th, 2015, 6:20 pm

You should listen to the games General Ironicus is part of
A man of many voices

User avatar
Alice
⦂☽
Posts: 3879
Joined: December 23rd, 2014, 10:47 pm
Location: Wonderland
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Alice » February 10th, 2015, 9:51 pm

Isocitration wrote:Man I need to learn to d&d someday

(buhmp)

It's actually fairly simple. Just takes some time to learn the rules is all. You can find the Pathfinder SRD here and the D&D 3.5e SRD here if you want to have a look at it. 4th edition and 5th edition don't look to have SRDs though. (4e kinda sucks in most peoples' opinions though anyways, can't speak about 5th though since I known literally nothing about it.) Personally I'd recommend Pathfinder though both Pathfinder and 3.5e run on the same underlying mechanics. (Pathfinder is intended as a more balanced version of 3.5e.)
💙💙💙
Image
Image


User avatar
TheFinalSentinel
Posts: 117
Joined: February 15th, 2015, 8:21 am
Location: The lost Xanadu
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby TheFinalSentinel » February 16th, 2015, 6:42 pm

I don't remember most of the details since this was years ago, but some highlights I remember:

My Stone Giant rogue uprooting and stealing an elaborate marble fountain from the middle of a crowded marketplace undetected.

The aforementioned accidentally blasting my friend's Bard with a mystic relic, forcibly transmogrifying him into the legendary Penor, The Penis Wizard.

Later on, Penor ended up impaling a harpy through the chest with his +3 "spear", getting stuck, and plummeting straight down a dark chasm and into a portal to Hell.

God I wish I could remember more, because I remember it all being pretty damn hilarious at least at the time.

User avatar
pholtos
Posts: 392
Joined: February 15th, 2015, 4:01 am

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby pholtos » February 16th, 2015, 7:29 pm

*Pokes head in*
If we actually did some sort of d&d shenanigans I would be up for joining
*bounces out of the room*

User avatar
Glitch
Posts: 1391
Joined: February 15th, 2015, 2:19 am
Location: the safety of Reinhardt's barrier
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Glitch » February 16th, 2015, 7:30 pm

Man, D&D is something I really would like to learn try out some time. Problem is that I haven't known enough people irl to actually try anything. I suppose online is also an option.

Gotta say though Sentinel, those are some pretty funny happenings. /will read the longer ones later

Obviously I don't have any stories, but here's a few things for some funny D&D stuff:
Out of Context D&D
Dice Shaming (this one is still active-ish)
Moar Dice Shaming
I suggest people go take a took. They can be quite funny.
Image
Image
IsoNation's resident bird nerd.

User avatar
Alice
⦂☽
Posts: 3879
Joined: December 23rd, 2014, 10:47 pm
Location: Wonderland
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Alice » February 16th, 2015, 7:35 pm

GlitchedGhost wrote:Out of Context D&D

I've actually been reading this one slowly over the past several days and they have some really hilarious entries.
💙💙💙
Image
Image


User avatar
Lunatic Quark
Posts: 60
Joined: December 25th, 2014, 7:48 am

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Lunatic Quark » February 16th, 2015, 9:47 pm

pholtos wrote:*Pokes head in*
If we actually did some sort of d&d shenanigans I would be up for joining
*bounces out of the room*


Same

Most of the RPs my main group did didn't have anything in the way of stats or structure, but I have played D&D once or twice before.

User avatar
Lead Luigi
Goldilocks Mario
Posts: 353
Joined: December 25th, 2014, 7:51 pm
Location: IDK I think it was like a pocket dimension or somethin
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Lead Luigi » February 17th, 2015, 1:51 am

Is seriously be down for D&D with you guys as long as I didn't have to talk :opieop:
something's coming...


Fuck Purple Town

User avatar
TheFinalSentinel
Posts: 117
Joined: February 15th, 2015, 8:21 am
Location: The lost Xanadu
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby TheFinalSentinel » February 17th, 2015, 6:12 am

I'd love to too... Although I'm probably pretty bad at RPing after these few years (not to say I was ever any good in the first place Image).

User avatar
Alice
⦂☽
Posts: 3879
Joined: December 23rd, 2014, 10:47 pm
Location: Wonderland
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Alice » February 22nd, 2015, 6:03 pm

Oohgie the Crafty-smith:
Image
Actually a pretty interesting story, albeit a long read.
💙💙💙
Image
Image


User avatar
Zummorr
Posts: 382
Joined: January 4th, 2015, 12:00 am

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Zummorr » February 24th, 2015, 4:22 am

Alice wrote:Oohgie the Crafty-smith:
Image
Actually a pretty interesting story, albeit a long read.


I enjoyed that read. I've played a small amount of DnD, but I don't really have too many notable stories.

I do find it notable that quite a few people seem to want to play it or learn though on this forum.

User avatar
Zummorr
Posts: 382
Joined: January 4th, 2015, 12:00 am

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Zummorr » February 24th, 2015, 4:30 am

Zummorr wrote:
Alice wrote:Oohgie the Crafty-smith:
Image
Actually a pretty interesting story, albeit a long read.


I enjoyed that read. I've played a small amount of DnD, but I don't really have too many notable stories.

I do find it notable that quite a few people seem to want to play it.

Isocitration wrote:Man I need to learn to d&d someday

(buhmp)


Its easy! you throw dice at dragons! :kappa:

User avatar
Alice
⦂☽
Posts: 3879
Joined: December 23rd, 2014, 10:47 pm
Location: Wonderland
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Alice » February 24th, 2015, 4:32 am

The big issue isn't finding people who want to play, it's finding a competent enough dm and a group that doesn't suck. Ie: My group has one guy who tries his best to exploit the rules to the fullest extent (not simply playing well but making broken characters I mean) and then the rest of the party rarely is interested in anything other than combat.

Speaking of the focus on combat, I had one of my players throw a fit earlier because normally D&D ignores racial discrimination despite it being very present in the lore (logical considering that D&D's setting is basically the 1300s or so). I'm going to impose penalties on non-standard races in social situations (which are going to be a bigger focus in my campaign than usual) until they've actually built up a reputation. I'll have three players and so far one is actually excited about the new challenges my focus will bring up as well as the challenge of roleplaying his nonstandard raced character in a discriminatory setting and the other who has actually been in contact about the campaign threw the fit because he wants to play a dragonborn character. (Funny enough the guy who's excited about it is playing a character who will face more discrimination too, lol.) Third guy hasn't been bothering to keep up with anything about the campaign. I'm not even sure he knows what ruleset we're playing yet, lol.
💙💙💙
Image
Image


User avatar
Zummorr
Posts: 382
Joined: January 4th, 2015, 12:00 am

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Zummorr » February 24th, 2015, 5:51 am

Alice wrote:The big issue isn't finding people who want to play, it's finding a competent enough dm and a group that doesn't suck. Ie: My group has one guy who tries his best to exploit the rules to the fullest extent (not simply playing well but making broken characters I mean) and then the rest of the party rarely is interested in anything other than combat.



Yeah the latter is the main reason why even though I've played DnD none of my stories really stand out.

User avatar
Alice
⦂☽
Posts: 3879
Joined: December 23rd, 2014, 10:47 pm
Location: Wonderland
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Alice » February 24th, 2015, 2:13 pm

I think my current story I have planned is going to be fairly unique. There's not just one but two huge twists I currently have planned in it. Neither of which the players are remotely likely to see coming. I'd say what they are as well as the basic storyline but two of the players are members of the forums so I don't want to risk spoiling it for them.
💙💙💙
Image
Image


User avatar
Alice
⦂☽
Posts: 3879
Joined: December 23rd, 2014, 10:47 pm
Location: Wonderland
Contact:

Re: Funny D&D and other roleplaying game stories

Postby Alice » March 16th, 2015, 2:51 pm

Tarrasque the Archmage:
Image
That was a really awesome to read story. I just with there was more of a conclusion than that. The rest of the story up until the conclusion was really awesome but then the end is just "yeah, they killed the Tarrasque and everything went back to normal the end".
💙💙💙
Image
Image



Return to “The Trash Heap”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest